Kinship With Adventure
by Random Guise
Summary: Zork, the classic text adventure game that has sent millions underground in search of treasure and fame. What about one of the lesser characters of the game? One you might not even know was there. This fandom needed at least one story that actually has something to do with the game. Yes, I have been eaten by a grue before.


**A/N: A tale about one of the brave adventurers never mentioned in the classic game Zork.**

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Kinship With Adventure

It was always the same.

Boris lived in a large metal box. He would wake in the morning, light shining in through a few small holes in the corners of his room. As the light shifted from the moving sun, he could read the large leaflet on the floor of his room.

 _WELCOME TO ZORK! ZORK is a game of adventure, danger, and low cunning. In it you will explore some of the most amazing territory ever seen by mortals. No computer should be without one!_

Usually, at some point the room would be lit suddenly by one wall falling away and some huge beast reaching in to remove the leaflet. Some read it silently, others muttered out loud as they followed the words. Boris didn't know what a computer was, but it must be a word for someone that was courageous and brave and very large.

Most often the wall was replaced and Boris could hear the beast walk away. Other times they left the wall down, and Boris could see out into the world. His house was high off the ground, with what appeared to be a dirt road going past. Across the road lay a very large house, white and very fancy; Boris would not have known what 'colonial' meant, but that was the style in which is was made. The beast would wonder off looking at things and sometimes return to the white house. Sometimes they never came back at all.

Each day the process would repeat itself, with Boris waking up only to be disturbed by a different beast as it reached for the leaflet which had reappeared during the night. Each was eager to start, and all had a look that spoke of the expectation of fame and fortune. Boris began to spend more of his time wondering where they went, what they did, and why some didn't come back; it must be that danger that was mentioned in the leaflet. At last he came to the realization that maybe he needed to try this adventure for himself, as he felt a kinship toward these adventuring beasts.

The next day he prepared himself mentally and waited by the wall. When it fell, he started to crawl outside while he had the opportunity, only to be crushed to death as the wall was slammed shut again.

The day after that he awoke with a start and saw that he was in the same place as every morning. Somehow alive again, he swore that this day would be his escape. When the wall opened again, he raced as fast as his eight legs would carry him. Fortunately, the beast chose not to close the wall and as he walked away Boris was able to rappel down to the ground below. Unfortunately, the beast came back to check the mailbox again and stepped on Boris, squishing him flat.

The following day he rappelled down, and as he was making his way toward the road he was eaten by a toad.

Too slow the next day, he was crushed as the mailbox door was closed again.

After several unsuccessful tries, he made it to the road where he was scooped up and eaten by a sparrow as he tried to cross.

The next day the beast threw the leaflet back into the mailbox, slicing Boris in half. Nobody likes a papercut.

Trying something new, on the following day Boris held on to the leaflet as it was removed from the mailbox. When it was jostled he lost his grip and flew off, to land on the man's arm. With a quick motion the man smashed the unwanted passenger.

After a few more fatal rounds of doors, toads and one untimely cart wheel Boris made it on to the man's coat and rode it across to the house. When the man squeezed in through the kitchen window, Boris became a tiny stain on the window sill.

After thirty-five attempts (and this may sound like an exaggeration but remember spiders count in base 8 so it was really only twenty-nine times) Boris gave up and returned to his existence living happily inside the mailbox, realizing that not everyone is cut out to be an adventurer. He devoted the rest of his time to a new pursuit, web designer.

The End

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 **A/N: Another category where the existing story or stories didn't really match up with the fandom, in this case one of the all-time classic text adventures. Most players ran off to hunt the troll and seek treasure without giving any thought to what else besides the leaflet might have been in the innocent mailbox.**

 **What's a text adventure? (Shakes head and goes into lecture mode) There was a time, kids, when computer games didn't have any graphics...**

 **For history buffs and nostalgia fans, Zork can be found and played on the internet. Remember, no graphics!**


End file.
